Harold The Giraffe Announces Campaign For MP Of Palmerston North
Beloved Life Education icon promises “fresh leadership, longer vision, and fewer vaping children behind the Plaza.”
Local News
All the latest fictional developments from the Herald satire desk, written for entertainment.
Kelvin Grove Cemetery Offering "Early Check In" Plan, Insists It's "Just Being Efficient"
New programme allows residents to reserve a plot, select their preferred headstone and begin receiving cemetery newsletters decades before they are expected to need them.
Palmerston North Airport To Become International Airport. Only Destination Pyongyang International Airport
Mayor says the new route will finally connect Palmerston North with another city known for grey skies, monumental architecture and limited entertainment options.
"It needs to go": NZDF ordered to “Remove” Palmerston North
NZDF ordered to “remove” Palmerston North after officials conclude city has caused enough suffering
Freaky Cow Won't Stop Harassing Passers By. Farmer Urged To Host BBQ
Local livestock nuisance escalates after witnesses report “unwanted tongue-based contact” near rural fence line.
“It Just Sounds Better”: Victoria Esplanade to Be Renamed “Seymour Gardens of Awesomeness”
Local park reportedly rebranded after officials conclude “Victoria Esplanade” lacks sufficient levels of personal branding and raw awesomeness.
Dunedin Herald acknowledge existence of PN Herald
The famous publication, The Dunedin Herald, has published a story saying our "notoriously s*** cities have finally got something to look forward to."
Palmy Bus Drivers Treat Red Lights As Suggestions
A study in Palmerston North has found 88% of the city's bus drivers can not drive.
Palmerston North local learns how to spell “Palmerston North”
A Palmerston North resident has made what locals are calling a “major personal breakthrough” after successfully spelling the city’s name without relying on "Palmy"